“She Gives Me a Break from the World”

Formal mentoring programs have historically tended to match youth with same-sex mentors; more recently, mentoring programs designed specifically for girls have begun cropping up in response to theories on gender and adolescent girls’ psychological health and development, which suggest girls have particular psychosocial needs and ways of relating. Yet, there have been few empirical studies that explicitly examine the relational processes in adolescent girls’ relationships with female mentors from the perspectives of the participants themselves. Using a holistic-content approach, 12 pairs of girls and women in the Big Sister Association of Greater Boston who been in mentoring relationships for between 2.5 to 11 years were interviewed. The girls, racially and ethnically diverse, ranged in age from 13 to 17 years, while the mentors, mostly single women, were White and 28 to 55-years of age.

The goal of this collaboration was for the adults to join in the process of working with the child to meet her goals and to offer support in expanding the reach of the child. The study acknowledges that the mentors ability to listen, respond with genuine thoughts and opinions while not passing judgment was in part because they were freed from the responsibilities of parenting. Examining these participants’ narratives about their experiences in the program, three interrelated relational processes were identified: (a) engaged and authentic emotional support; (b) the development of new skills and confidence through collaborations; and, (c) experiences of companionship that provided relief from daily stresses. The findings from this study suggest that programs serving girls should be cautious about prioritizing emotional support over skill-building, or assuming that skill-building may undermine more collaborative or bi-directional relationships between female youth and adult program participants. Instead, attention should be given to integrating various types of support in interventions for girls, as emotional support and collaborative skill-building may play a synergistic role in supporting the positive development of female youth. Further, the focus on these types of relationships will inform further studies of the process of mentoring and provide insights for practitioners of a variety of gender-specific prevention programs.